Intuition

Women have this thing called "woman's intuition." I can say that mine are accurate for the most part. Since my breakup, I have this feeling that me and him will get back together. But how much of that is intuition, and not just what I really want? I really, really want it to happen, but it being an intuition has become a blur. I just don't know anymore. Knowing that he and the girl listing thier relationship on facebook really hurts. Where do I stand with him? He's turning 24 this year, so could she be "the one" for him? How long have they been "talking" and then turned it into a relationship? I think maximum of 5 months? We were dating on and off for 1.5yrs before we became official with a title.
I'm so tired. I don't know what to do. I want to ask him ultimately if he sees me in his future. If he says no, then all ties and contacts will be cut. If I ask my friends advice/what to do, they would probably say that I should have severed all ties a year ago. I think all this time, I've been afraid to sever ties with him because it would mean that I've lost him- the love of my life.
I feel there's not much to look forward to after graduation. Finishing high school was not an option in my family, so graduating from high school was predictable. Finishing college is also not an option; so if I go to college, finish, then graduating is a guarentee. But nothing else in life is a guarentee. When I go out and look for a job, a promotion in the company is not a guarentee- I've seen quite a few people quit their current job with a great company to take on a different jobs. Marriage and kids are never a guarentee in life.
Why have I let myself get so wrapped up in relationships? Growing up, having a boyfriend was never a priority for me. I guess it's like, I never knew I needed it until I had it and then lost it. It's been a year and I can't get back to the old me. The me that was career driven, confident, happy, and when a boyfriend was never a priority. Back then, it would have been nice to have a boyfriend, but I didn't care for it too much. Now, I'm worried about the relationship aspect of my life. Why have I changed liked this?
I miss him so much. All my friends are saying "you'll find someone better," but they don't know that. Even I wouldn't bet everything I have on that. I'm afraid this girl could be "the one" for him, and where does that leave me? What's keeping me together right now is the possibility of hope. Ironic how there's a part of me that remains optimistic. Or is this just being stupid and naive?
Some of my friends say I should take this to church, and to pray about it. But I can't say that I believe. If something bad happens people say that it's God's will, and that takes the responsibilities off their hands. People need to take responsibilities for their actions. If something great happens, they praise God for it. But I feel that it's the hard work or good that they've done, and by praising God for it they don't recognize what they've done for themselves.
I can't say that I believe in God. I kinda sort of believe in coincidences and destiny. I'm not sure if I believe that everything happens for a reason. I believe that we have two choices in life, and you have to decide which path to choose. We choose which path we want to take, which will inevitably lead us to different experiences and outcomes. Wouldn't it be cool if there was a paralle universe, and we get to ask "what if I did this, and chose to do this, what would my life have been like?" and all these other "what if" questions.
My "What If" Questions: WHAT IF...
-I never came to UCLA?
-I never gave Ryan and I a chance?
I wish I could get those answers, but that's just not possible. I will never know.